11.02.17 | 11:15am

EDEN PRAIRIE, MN – Citing numerous distractions, side projects, and hobbies taken up and quickly discarded, friends and associates of supermarket deli manager Troy Grenn told reporters today that he is unable to get his shit together long enough to read Jack Canfield’s perennial self-help best-seller “The Success Principles.”

“He’s been going on and on about how he has to read that book,” said George Emeritz, 25, who frequently socializes with the 24-year-old Grenn. “But he always seems to get pulled in another direction. First there were the Krav Maga classes, then he got really into fly fishing, then it was his homebrewing beer kit.”

The 624-page softcover tome has been sitting on Grenn’s nightstand for the past seven months.  

“He sometimes quotes from the book,” said John Berg, 20, a co-worker of Witt’s at the local Cub Foods. “The other day he told me, ‘John, if you get clear on the what, the how will take care of itself.’ I think he got that from the Amazon reviews.”

“I’ll get around to reading it for sure,” Grenn told reporters. “I feel like I’ve already benefited from it. On the back, there’s an excerpt where [Canfield] says we have ‘100%responsibility for our own lives.’ I love that. I’m sure there’s a lot of other great stuff in there.” At press time, Grenn was reportedly meeting up with his Geocaching group at Carver Park Reserve.

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"He's been going on and on about how he has to read that book," said George Emeritz, 25, who frequently socializes with the 24-year-old Grenn.